The McSuicide Experiment Day 24

Before Today…


A new friend came over yesterday. One from my generation (currently in 20s) and we actually had conversations without Netflix or other distractions. Probably cuz no WiFi and he doesn’t like gin and all my other liquids weren’t desired. Admittedly he had just been food satisfied so my inner hostess sat back down and only offered things every thirty minutes.

I told him about this study and was met with….expected yet now unexpected ideas. The depression and dark thoughts he had experienced in life weren’t due to food and couldn’t be boiled down to something so simple. “You’re trying to say I got depressed due to eating a burrito?” Me: “Well I think it’s mostly eating fast food and…I’m not fully sure yet. I think once we’ve accessed those connections of negativity/life ending thoughts we can connect to them for years to come. I just no longer think it’s so special to get depressed but might be explainable. Have you ever analyzed the depressing thoughts or…what have they been?” From there he just shook his head and said that he doesn’t think food affects the mind and we don’t know what healthy is anymore. It keeps changing all the time. Then we talked about movies for an hour.

Sigh…humans are so annoying.

I can also maybe be annoying.

Everyone is annoying.

He’s also right…food/health changes so much it’s as trustworthy as Santa Claus being real.

So I thought back on what it is that convinced me of this. What changed this mind from not caring what energy source it was using mentally to noticing that our minds use the same energy source our body does? They aren’t separate because the mind is in the body. It took…well the main noticement occurred in the car…so much happens in that car. I was driving for hours and had some road trip snacks of almonds, coconut butter and kale. Well I had already eaten bacon and eggs before the drive and then got hungry about an hour in. Grr. *eats coconut butter and doesn’t feel better* *eats kale* My mind tingled and the world got a bit brighter/I was…full again. It was a different type of full though…the same feeling of hunger I get from working out and craving bacon was cured with kale…I was mentally hungry. So. I’ve conducted an idea for an experiment for you. I didn’t actually feel like drawing so it isn’t very good…but some people absorb things visually so I made a visual.

Basically eat something to fill your stomach like meat or eggs or cheese (or all) and then do a mind activity. You can learn math/chemistry or start learning a language or read a book or just find some mental work to do. Do it until you feel mental tingles/mind hunger. Then eat kale, brussels sprouts or chard. Spinach might work but I haven’t tried that one. Eat it raw if you can handle it. 

See if you feel different.

Actually if you’ve been on a fast food diet or never eaten it just go eat kale and feel the mind tingles. Then tell me about them.  😉

Also I got harshly cut off by a car that swerved into my lane while I was going 40 and they came in at 20. Then they cut across two other lanes and went into McDonald’s.

On the Next Episode…

I’m basically back to my average line of thinking…but from…a while ago. From life changes thoughts changed and thoughts revolved around adapting to Lubbock and school and going to Marfa as well as finally forseeing future plans versus letting it chaotically capture me and deal with results.
Now that things are a lot more planned and the blog is settling some I have relaxed mentally. Thoughts mildly damper into existence and all of that as well as doing yoga or planting things. None of it life invoking. Basically thoughts aren’t stimulating in the negative or positive sense so I can notice more of a latent variable, making life basically a non variable. I’m not stimulated enough to live due to the blog or Animal but I’m not depressed enough from fast food or being broke (moderately steady income and a work family I enjoy).
It’s been about a day of this so I’ll keep you updated on data but it seems in eating foods consisting of how I basically used to eat (healthy but with random not healthy) I’ve also accessed/sunk into who I was before/in a general Ainsley life.

If I’m eating the same food as before starting this experiment and even before starting keto it could trigger similar hormone responses/utilize old connections reached from food. Rephrase: Eating past food causes past mind?

This line of thinking assumes that food and mind are linked. I don’t know how much my mind has changed since then though and what connections it has reached and uses since growing from that time.

Overall though it might cause similar mental affects now as it did then and I’m still in the same mind and body as then….not sure where similarities begin and end really.

So now I can exist in that mind and analyze it with current knowledge (from experiment) and gain self baseline data before the next phase of experiment.

So that will be baseline data.

Right after deciding to get this baseline data…

Stahp

Then Comes

Basically starting tomorrow I’ll be eating the same food for three weeks. Next week I’ll control all thoughts and mind activity for three days then just let life happen and track the data. The next week I’ll do the same but with negative thoughts and track the data. This is the closest I can get to discounting life variables and making it just about the food. 

After all of that I’ll repeat the phase but with a Pop-Tart in the morning (has caused most noticeable correlation of happy to negative) and a cupcake at night and see what happens.

Oh also I’m still obsessed with this thing:

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